I know this to be true
“I think when it’s all over, it just comes back in flashes, you know? Like a kaleidoscope of memories. It just all comes back … but he never does. I think part of me knew from the second I saw him that this would happen. It’s not really anything he said or anything he did. It was … the feeling that came along with it, and the crazy thing is, I don’t know if I’m ever going to feel that way again … and I don’t know if I should. I knew his world moved too fast and burned too bright, but I just thought … how can the devil be pulling you towards someone who looks so much like an angel when he smiles at you? Maybe he knew that when saw me … I guess I just lost my balance … I think that the worst part of it all wasn’t losing him … It was losing me. I don’t know if you know who you are until you lose who you are.”
..now I’m finding my self again without him..
I think I’ve begun to realize why my life doesn’t seem to be working out. Its because I had chosen to walk without God. With this understanding it dawns on me that my relationship with these men were never a success because my God was jealous for me. I realize that just like in ywam he wants him to be my first love. Not a man who will surely break me. He wants me to feel his love and for me to love him in return, before another man is able to enter my heart. It seem weird to say all this when in the back of my mind I’m thinking about all the other relationship that work out without God. But I know God lives and I know he wants my love.